***PASSWORDS RELEASED: SEE BELOW – UNLOCK BARBECUE NIRVANA***
You’ve found the True You Programme, where meat will set you free. The inspirational 30-day Self Help guide, everyone is talking about. We’re changing lives by the smoker-load. Relax.
Perhaps you’ve read about it in Miracle Meat Monthly? Or perchance a family member with a penchant for brisket and trampolines has recommended it?
We suspect though that for the vast majority, you’ve happened upon it by pure, blissful chance – a simple act of serendipity in the mire of the January Blues. However you’ve found the bosom of enlightenment and fulfilment, you’re safe, you’re home.
For the next 30-days, through the medium of meat (and probably a lot of hot air & bullsh*t), your life is set to change.
Be sure to follow it live on one of these channels:
Don’t have Instagram but want to view and comment? Check it here
The 4-Steps of Empowerment will open your eyes, mind, heart and belly to new levels of barbecue nirvana.
– Stage 1: Look Inside Yourself –
Emptiness is a disease. We’ll give you the know-how to banish your past forever and set you on course to a tasty cure
– Stage 2: Alignment & Focus –
With a new mindset, you’ll agree new goals, new aspirations, new desires (gold lamé shorts are advisable for this stage)
– Stage 3: Believe & Achieve –
You’ll begin to notice the difference. You’re faster. Quicker. Wittier. You might even grow a few ginger tufts as you begin to believe in yourself
– Stage 4: Emergence –
Who is this swan, emerging from the ugly duckling ranks of unachievingness? It’s you of course. The True You. Praise be!
We can’t say it will be easy. Nor can we say everyone will make this arduous emotional and physical journey. But for those that do, those happy few, January 2015 will shine upon you, like a well polished helmet.
The key to success and achieving your goals – FREE BBQ – are passwords. Hidden password. Be vigilant. Gold frames hold the answer. Make note, and when the time is right (see below), act fast. Use your training, and reap the rewards.
Remember, together, working as one, meat will set us all free.
Have you followed the programme thus far? Deserve to earn free BBQ? Unlock meaty rewards now.
Choose you Church of True Barbecue and enter the password (Check Day 5 film Harness The Pain for a clue – it’s case sensitive)